An Ad for a "Matchbreaking" Service

This is a satirical ad campaign below. I claim all copyrights to it in perpetuity throughout the universe.

Are you sick of having to tell your spouse where you’re going and when you’re coming back? Do you dread having to spend time with those meddling in-laws? Do you long to travel without having to compromise doing the things you REALLY want to do? Don’t you just want to not have to “perform” for your family every holiday? Are you sick of your single friends asking you, “When are you getting divorced?” Do you just LONG for freedom but don’t have the confidence or the funds to end it?

Well, we can help! At Match-Breakers, we quietly instigate incidents that will GUARANTEE your spouse will leave you – instantly. Because why should you be tied down just because society says you’re supposed to?
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Call us at 1-800-GO-SOLOS for a free, confidential consultation, and you’ll be well on your journey back to happy singlehood!