The Childfree Life as a Political Issue

​In my book, How to be a Happy Bachelor, I cited Lindsey Graham as a famous single person.  Tim Scott was decried by his fellow Republicans for being single, probably because it’s more socially acceptable for them to put his marital status down than it is for his race.  So I’ve always thought of Happy Singlehood as a nonpartisan issue.
 
I’ve been speculating that eventually, the laws that discriminate against singles will change as more and more people go the nonmarital route.  I didn’t think it would happen during my lifetime, but I’ll do my part to help change those laws. 
 
Thanks to the comments of a JD Vance, that might change quicker than we thought.  I didn’t know much about him when Trump picked him to be his running mate, and as is typical in the high-profile world of politics, all the old dirt came up on him.  For example, he had decried Trump a few years earlier.  The fact that he’s running with him and embracing his policies just speaks to his own hypocrisy.
 
But, the one that has all my social media feeds abuzz is what he said about “childless cat ladies” running the country.  The memes about proud childless cat ladies, childless dog ladies, supporters of childless cat ladies, started to flicker.  I started posting “I Stand with Childless Cat Ladies” on Facebook.
 
And then Biden stepped down, which I felt was a good thing. He immediately endorsed Kamala Harris, his VP, whom Vance had foolishly referred to as one of the “childless cat ladies,” even though she is a stepmother.  Pete Buttigieg and his husband have a son.  George Washington, one of our the United States’s founders, was also a stepparent. 
 
That said, in the few days since Harris has been the favorite for VP nominee, those memes spread quite rapidly.  I was particularly pleased to see this article in Ms. Magazine.  There was also this nice Opinion piece in The New York Times.  In fact, the backlash was so big Vance needed to respond to it.  And he just sounded even dumber this time. 
 
I’ve always tried to keep my politics out of this blog, but Singles Studies is a very political field, much like most other fields of study.  And Vance’s comments attack our ilk, no matter where you’re at on the spectrum.  The good thing is that his comments have garnered so much hatred, even from parents, that the childfree life is gaining widespread notice and support.  Some of that support is coming from parents.  This is because, well, mothers are women, and his comment is not only disparaging of childfree life, but the underlying message “a woman’s place is in the home and with her kids,” an outdated idea.
 
For the record, I’m not anti-family.  But I do believe family can take on many different meanings.  A family can consist of a man, a woman, and a child (or more than one child).  It can consist of an uncle and two nieces.  An aunt and a nephew.  Two friends.  A person and a cat (or dog).  But Vance’s definition of family is sadly limiting, and my hope is that his comment will raise awareness that the childfree life is just fine.  I’ve known some left-leaning folks that don’t quite get that either, so if they want to be aligned with the equity that comes with Harris’s campaign, they’ll have to accept that others may not necessarily follow their path.
 
A final note: I’ve always advocated for the term “childFREE” as opposed to “childless” to refer to people who don’t want kids.  But I recently ordered a shirt that says “Purroud Childless Cat Guy.”  I feel it’s good to take that term from people like Vance.  I’ll still use the former, but I’ll wear a shirt with the latter.  To quote Vance, it’s sarcasm.
 
I stand with Childfree Cat Ladies.  And Dog Ladies.  And Cat Men.  And Dog Men.  Anybody who’s for equity really.